the sunday brief | how to find a hair stylist

time and again readers ask questions about my hair. or ask for advice. was it hard to transition from colored hair to grey? any tips? what products do i use? how do i style my hair? how to find a hair stylist? so today i thought we would take a moment to discuss ‘all things hair.’  because if there is one thing that’s worth investing in it’s your hair. a great haircut will keep you at the top of your style game and give you oodles of confidence. think of it as your best accessory. the one you wear each and every day. 

it’s not always easy finding a fabulous hair stylist. and there might be more than one haircut gone awry before you find one that you love. through the years i’ve definitely had my fair share of bad haircuts. haven’t we all? the good news is hair grows back. the bad news is you’re stuck with a style you hate. at least for the time being. like this one. as luck would have it i had just started blogging. my previous stylist had just moved to new york, and i was on the hunt for a new one whether i liked it or not. needless to say, i did not go back to this hairdresser.

instead, i held my head high (or tried to) as the search continued with the help of the internet and social media. now more than ever it’s easy to read online reviews or scroll through stylists instagram accounts. that’s how i discovered karmen when we lived in san francisco. here’s what my first haircut looked like.

here’s my third haircut.


as you can see there were no more worries about my hair until we moved to athens, ga a little over two years ago. then the dreaded search began for a new hairdresser. sometimes looking for a fab hairstylist feels like searching for a needle in a haystack. do they exist? take a peek at the next three photos. each haircut is by a different stylist. all three hairstyles are good. but can you tell the difference?

after a year of testing out different hairdressers, i found joseph gordon around july 2017. yes, it took that long before i found ‘the one.’ take a peek at his work.

style trends for fall

faux leather leggings, silk blouse and fring cardigan by style at a certain age

joseph let my hair grow out a bit then whacked it off at the beginning of 2018. i feel so comfortable with him that i pretty much let him do whatever he wants with my hair. i felt the same way about karmen. that’s when you know you’ve found the perfect stylist. it’s all about trust level.

gucci python handbag with bamboo handles

j.crew cashmere sweater, old navy rockstar jeans, talbots puffer jacket, talbots scarf, everlane loafers

tips for finding a hairstylist.

  • don’t feel guilty about investing in your hair. a great stylist is worth every penny. cut back on other expenses if you need to. but not your hair.
  • if you notice a haircut you like ask who their stylist is. even if they are a stranger.
  • it will take two to three haircuts before you and your stylist hit your stride. but if the first try doesn’t feel right – it isn’t. next, please.
  • browse social media – facebook, twitter, and instagram are all great resources.
  • read reviews. yelp, angie’s list, or city voter are a few places to start.
  • know your products. do you like oribe, kerastase, or kevin murphy? visit their website. often times they have a salon locator that allows you to search for local salons that carry their products. 

how to transition from dyed to grey hair.

well, i don’t have a dramatic story to tell as i’ve had gray hair since the ripe old age of seventeen. through the years i highlighted my hair to reveal rather than conceal the grey. when i hit fifty my fabulous hairstylist in minneapolis recommended we quit highlighting altogether and let it go ‘au naturel.’ it was a painless process. but for those of you who color your hair and want a few tips to ‘go gray’ this is what joseph shared with me.

  • discuss your options with your hairstylist. this is a big decision and having the input of professionals is an important first step.
  • grow your roots an inch or two then opt for a pixie cut to remove the dye from your hair.
  • not ready for a drastic change? try a color correction then add highlights for a ‘salt and pepper’ look. this will take continual upkeep as it can take six months to a year to go from color to gray.
  • have long hair? keep your hair in a ponytail or bun and use a color stick on your roots.


how do we combat the effects of aging hair?

yes, our hair like our skin is aging with us. first and foremost healthy hair starts with a healthy diet. lot’s of lean protein is important, avoiding too much fat, eating the right carbs, and drinking lots of water is key.

  • get a regular trim every six to eight weeks to keep your hair healthy and growing.
  • washing your hair removes natural oils so skip a few days. since i workout regularly i alternate shampoo and conditioner with conditioner only.
  • wet hair is fragile. instead of wrapping your hair in a towel after your shower just blot with a towel.
  • chemical treatments like bleaching, straightening and dying cause the hair to become stiff and dry, causing it to break. make certain to use the best products for color treated hair.

what hair products do i recommend?

here are the products i use daily and weekly to keep my hair in tip-top condition. masques are a key step that adds moisture to my hair. 

shampoo Kerastase Discipline Bain Fluidealiste. conditioner Kerastase Discipline Fondant Fluidealiste. once a week: deep conditioner Kerastase Discipline Maskeratine.

i alternate Kerastase products with Kevin Murphy Young Again products made specifically for aging hair. Young Again WashYoung Again Rinse, and Young Again Masque.

last but not least i use a shampoo that specifically keeps my grey hair from looking dull and lifeless. R+CO Sunset Blvd Blonde ShampooR+CO Sunset Blvd Blonde Conditioner.

hairbrush Olivia Garden Ceramic + Ion round brush, Olivia Garden Ceramic + Ion paddle brush.

 happy sunday, ladies!



  1. bonnieblue031 wrote:

    Glad you found a stylist, it is a very difficult process. I’d like a more fashionable haircut but I have not found a stylist that recommends anything they just do what I want to do. What I want is their expertise and style recommendations. I will find that stylist. Just takes time.

    Posted 6.3.18
    • it does take time to find the right stylist. but when you finally do it’s a great day!

      Posted 6.7.18
  2. Sharon Wilgenburg wrote:

    You look fabulous, Beth! Thank you for sharing this long-awaited information. As it happens, I’m trying a new stylist on Wednesday. I decided to embrace my waves and curls, so I’ve been letting my hair grow since February, so hopefully the new person will have something to work with. 🙂

    Posted 6.4.18
    • good luck with your new stylist! it always helps to have a little bit of length to work with. fingers crossed for you.

      Posted 6.7.18
  3. Aly H wrote:

    Beth, I have similar story: prematurely gray, “had to color” starting at 22, add decades of coloring, :::insert scream::: LOL
    2018: I stopped fighting it. I have ever bit as much gray as you and I’m 46. I’m rocking a pixie.

    Posted 6.5.18
    • your pixie cut sounds easy, breezy! and gray is the new blonde after all.

      Posted 6.7.18

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